Bad Credit Baby - Bad Credit Credit Card

Bad Credit Credit Card Blues

Little Baby needs her blankey. Baby baby get time out for bad behavior. What did little baby waby do to rack up the loss of rights and privileges? Baby was bad today. Baby should start all over again with a bad credit credit card.

Baby was feeling blue today. Baby got a hold of a sharpy. White gleaming wall, freshly repainted. Baby make sure the cheerful glow was reduced to the darkest of hues. Not just that, but Baby colored her own face in efforts to become invisible. Guess what? It didn't work. All it did was make Mommy's mouth set firmly into her face and the funny little lines showed up on her forehead. Baby got spanked with a bad credit credit card and Mommy told her there will come a time when she will want credit but she won't get any because she is bad through and through.

Mommy and Baby and the bad credit credit card

Baby knows that Mommy will get over it. Mommy will sit in the porcelain bath and struggle with the cork of a bottle of wine. She will have some cruddy music from centuries ago blaring on the quadraphonic sound system. There will be candles and baby's lungs will begin to feel claustrophobic as they are filled with the sweet sickly smoke of the incense. Mommy will come out in her fuzzy slippers and with the towel wrapped too tightly on her head and tell her about bad credit.

She will pontificate on the good, the bad, the bad credit credit card. She will then sing The Facts of Life theme song to lighten the mood. She will explain that Little Baby will have to pay a higher interest rate if she wants to get back on good terms. This means less whining and more opening wide when peas and carrots are served. This means - less drool - more smiles. This means less jibber jabber. This means she is to do what it takes to get out of the stigmatic bad credit card dog house.

Oh Mommy. What would Little Baby do without these lessons? What is the fun of being alive and under two years old if you can't occasionally misbehave and get served a bad credit credit card? Jeez, it's not like Little Baby can just take off to the park or ride into the sunset on her Big Wheel when feeling bored or frustrated. No, instead, Little Baby has to push Mommy to the limit and go through the whole credit card balance risk with reward cycle. For laffs. For something to do other than watch the silly figures on the mobile. Clowns. Whoever thought a clown mobile would be a good idea? Those clowns give Little Baby nightmares. She is going to serve them their very own version of a bad credit credit card.

Related Resources: